Failed friend?

I’m an Introvert, I don’t really social well with others cause I just unable to. Sometimes I feels I did not try hard enough and tried to makes in effort to talk but I hardly gets any feed back and got tired. I wanted to be in your page of life, I wanted to be knowing about how are you doing at this point of life, I wanted to rsvp to all your life events but I can’t. I wanted to tell you, invite me, invite me to all this but I do not want to disturb you and do not blame me for over thinking that you already did not wants me to be in your page of life. I got tired for trying but got nothing back, I got so tired of staying behind the scenes waiting for you to contact me.

Do you even knew that I got so disappointed with myself cause I can’t social well with you? My grandfather passed away weeks ago and told many, only three got back and send their condolences. I was sad with myself of not caring enough to notify all of you that I’m here for you and hope you all can let me know I am still on your page despite that you are as busy as I do too? Do you even remember that I am still here as a listening ear of yours and is willing to help if I can? Or am I just being forgotten cause I was not able to social well with you? Or I am just a friend that you just think of when you needed me? 

I do not know how can I do to continue our relationship when I know I had tried caring. Maybe I just was not fated to walk thru life with you anymore. Maybe I was forgotten in a sense where I was not needed by you. Maybe, maybe… All this maybes hurt so bad of wanting to know what is your standing in life, are you still doing well, do you need anyone to listen to your troubles… 

I know how hard to find someone who can keep good secrets, I personally do not tell my troubles out easily. But if you are willing, I can give you my ear and keep it well. I may not be able to give you a good solution or what but least I can help you with lightening up what is bothering you recently. 

Can you please do remember me, as someone who is most willing to chat with you and willing to put in effort to make our relationship works like it used to be? Can you please make sure that you are most willing to invite me over to your life events and tell me you are doing this good in life? As an Introvert personal, I thank you for being there for me and automatically tells me what is going on in your life. A simple message means lots to me even you can’t personally invites me over. Am I, am I even worthy to be there with you?

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3 thoughts on “Failed friend?

  1. You aren’t a failure of a friend, Jamix. Trust me, you put in the effort, cared, and really tried for this person. If you’re growing apart from them, that’s on them. I’ve been in a similar position before with one of my oldest friends. I tried to be there for him in a bad time in his life, and he just wasn’t having it. What I got from that was that people grow apart sometimes, even if they’ve known each other for half their lives. Sometimes it’s not even anyone’s fault. Try to keep your chin up, ok? I’m here to listen if you need a friend. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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