Last days of 2017.

Well, everything comes and goes with a blink of eye. This year is a shitty yet not so shitty year to me. Despite my relapse wasn’t that often that often this year, which I’m totally grateful for, but there are so much more I came across that shook me off at a snap.

Although I have finally found a job, a part time job that had no future according to my maternal grandmother and my mother, least it does helps me in stepping out of my shell by a bit. Well, it actually helps me, this boring Introvert out to this not so exciting world by this much where I am not so awkward with strangers though. 

Things been wavy since my maternal grandfather passing, had just found out my parent’s divorce after 20 years while they tried to cover it up. It wasn’t my surprise actually, I had already see this coming and my calm reaction shocked those whom told me. Although I tried to help talking thru but this whole thing was so complicated that it was so hard to talk through after this many years and this many things that happened. 

I don’t blame my parents, I know they had tried to protect this “perfect” family alive but all this did not work out. It also set me wondering that if my dad never comes back, will everything be less chaotic then it is now? Since he had been away most of my childhood life. It was never a perfect family from my perspective anyway. 

Despite all this bad shits that I am, my mom and I are going through, there is always things that makes you happy. Three of cousins / cousin in laws had gave birth to boys and it was a great addition for us. 

Babies does always brings joy to life. Their reactions always are this adorable that it will brings laughter to your life and it is a instant bright up. 

Not only that, I found out I am more independent after all this shits happens. A happy growth indeed eh? 

All I wish for the following year is just a less wavy year. A more Smooth sail year that brings more laughter in my life. 

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